4: Spiritual Prep

Physical preparation can be completed the week or so before travelling, however the spiritual preparation and education should begin as soon as possible, even for the smallest of children.

Najaf

There are various manuals you can use to educate yourself and your children on where you will be going, one I suggest, is http://www.al-islam.org/ziyarat/, there are maps, general information and also pictures.
There is also, http://www.ziaraat.org/index.htm.  I also had some biographical books on the Imams and companions that I read and had my children read.
 I copied pages from my Mafati in Arabic and English, but if you can find one comprehensive Ziarat book that is better. Def. have a copy of Ziarat Ashura with you.
I would also suggest watching Sayed Ammar Nakshawani's Biographies on the Imams on YouTube. Below is the Biography of Imam Ali (as), there are videos on all 14 masoomeen. You can focus on the Imams you will be visiting or even better watch all 14 as, of course, they are all related to one another.

Your group should also send you information on how to prepare for Ziyarat and the benefits. http://www.ziaraat.org/articles/etiq.pdf- Good PDF file on importance of Ziyarat.  And also
http://www.asserattours.com/ebooks/Iraaq_eng%20(Final)%20Big.pdf
I found that reading the importance of this journey and reminding them of the magnitude of the personalities we were visiting really had an impact on my older kids.

Also began watching the Mukthar Nama series, as you will be doing his ziyarat in Iraq as well. It is a total of 40 series, one hour each, so make sure you start a month ahead of your travels. Above video is episode 1.
There are also movies on some of the Imams, although not as produced as well.

3: Preparation

Part 3: Preparations

Having four kids, even one for that matter, requires a fair amount of preparation when travelling to places where there are health hazards and limited access to pharmacies, even when travelling alone. Therefore, you have to be prepared.  I had a pool of contacts, some of whom had been on Ziyarat, with or without kids, and some in the medical field. I made lists of their recommendations and a list of medical supplies I would need.  Be advised, when you ask for advice be weary who you are asking.  I say this with all due respect. I had one older Aunty of mine who had just come back and her list was endless...nebulizer for asthma, 'Have you seen how heavy those are?'  I protested. Flashlight for when the electricity shuts off, 'Really? Will it be turned off all night?' Images of my younger children wailing in the darkness broke my chain of thought as I was jotting down everything she said.  'Okay, what else Aunty?', she mentioned alarm clocks, socks, glucose tablets, mints, socks, change of clothes for every single day, socks, q-tips, and make sure you don't forget the socks, she insisted.
Of course your personality also plays a big part as to what you may or may not want to bring with you. If you like everything to be on hand then by all means buy everything from where you are. If you can manage with the necessities and are willing to search for various general items in Iraq or Iran, that is also a feasible option, but be warned that there is limited time, when you are travelling with a group, to do shopping.  I will insert that there were plenty of people selling boxed socks, the kind you can easily do wudhu in, everywhere, especially Najaf, Iraq.

Here is my finalized list, after having come back:
Med kit:
-Antibiotics (you'll have to get your doctor to prescribe or if you are Hyderabadi, your family)
*One family did not have antibiotics on them for their child and easily were directed to a pharmacy.
-Antibacterial foam or wipes for wounds (neosporin) and also for regular use when the kids have their hands on everything
-Plasters/band aides
-Probiotic capsules (Sustenex) For children they have gummy supplements (I found these invaluable and a necessary protection for the digestive system)
-Pedialyte (Electrolyte for dehydration) and Gatorade powder
-Sunscreen
-ChapStick (a must)

I had the below on hand, but alhumdulillah did not need:
-Ibuprofen for kids (Motrin)
-Tylenol or Paracetamol for kids
-Pepto Bismol
-Saline spray
-Dramamine -For motion sickness
-Anti-Diarrhea capsules
-Thermometer (find out if there is a Doctor travelling with your group, they will probably be carrying this with them)
I had more (like antacid, stool softener, etc) but honestly I don't think you will need, insh'Allah. Worse comes to worse, there will be a pharmacy and you'll have to manage with whatever they have. Just take the necessities.

I would advise you to pack the following toiletries:
-Shampoo/conditioner (the hotels have some but its up to you if you want to use, it won't be Pantene or whatever you're used to)
-Soap- You can manage with the hotel soap but if not then pack your own
-Toilet Paper- My cousin warned me and I did not pay heed. The hotels, all of them, from Iran to Iraq, for some strange reason only will provide less than 1/4 roll then your own your own. You can improvise with the tissue (some version of Kleenex) if you can't be bothered to pack rolls. Outside of the hotel there will be NONE, be warned!
-Squirting bottle for the toilet helps to avoid the pipe in the Asian toilets.
-Sunscreen/Lotion-Depending on when you go, the sun is pretty intense, it can be taxing on the skin, especially for the little ones (pack a hat for them)
-I did not use the Q-Tips often as the hijab protects the ears from dust but for the boys or small girls you may want to pack
-Female Necessities-always be prepared. If you do have any issues with menses, know where you are allowed to enter or not. Do not feel bad or ashamed, Allah has made us the way we are for a reason, and it is natural and normal.  Just because you can not enter under the dome of the shrines does not mean you can not share in having a conversation with our Imams, whether from afar or near, Allah knows your intention and by simply being in that environment and on that sacred land you will feel more than satisfied and appreciative.
An extra pair of glasses or contacts-sometimes trying to get to the zaari can prove quite difficult and glasses can get knocked off and broken.
I was advised to pack my own towels and sheets-Every hotel we went to had towels. I used the sheets in Kerbala as the sheets on the bed kept coming off (I left the ones I brought there)

Bags/Purse: Best not to carry too much on you in Iraq, there are so many security checkpoints where you will get a full body pat down and have each of your bags examined.  I carried a ID pouch around my neck with my money, hotel business card with the address (wherever you stay ask for a hotel card at the front desk)...very important if you get lost, as I did : (
I also kept my dua book/s in my hands so I wouldn't waste time at the security checks. If you do need to carry a bag, I would suggest using one of those sports sacs with the straps and then have only a few things inside which you can quickly open and show.

Suitcases: The smaller the bags the better, the less you take the better. Do not take your best most expensive bags, expect a lot of wear and tear as your bags will be thrown and dropped numerous times. I would also advise to pack an emergency roll on hand bag to keep with you on the flight, that you do not check in. Pack in an extra set of everything and keep your most important things with you, in case your bags get lost or delayed. Anyone taking prescription medications, keep them with you!

Clothing: (Women)

• Abaya/Chador: You will be wearing an Abaya and chador almost everyday. They do have dry cleaning services at the hotel or you can hand wash your clothes (takes some work-and in that case bring a little washing liquid)
• Chador: I borrowed from a gracious friend, you can also have one made or the easiest option is to buy one when you get to Iraq (around $15-25) The Iraqi chador has sleeves, which I found easier to manage with kids, the Irani chador I would recommend with the elastic for behind the head.

This one I found on this US site for $45  http://www.alhannah.com/images/products/ab/397/detail.jpg, that's $25 more than in Iraq.

       You can also wear knee length shirts with trousers and chador or Iraqi abaya on top.

• Scarves- I tried to pack enough for the 2 weeks so I wouldn't have to wash, doesn't have to be black but I would advise against bright reds.
• T shirts/long sleeve t shirts- to wear underneath.
• I wore track suit bottoms under the abaya, and also bought leggings but I found the leggings too hot as they are tighter. I would pack enough to last you a week, then you can wash. Some sisters had jeans but I find them too hot as well.
• Socks- my aunt was right, you need them. They get lost, they get dusty, and they need to be changed everyday. You can buy off the street if need be.

• Underwear- pack enough for however long your staying...too embarrassing to send off for dry cleaning, you could hand wash.

Kids:
(Boys)- I found the boys wearing the dishdasha (thoub) looked the most comfortable. Can be found in Iraq.
They can wear short sleeves and trousers, no shorts obviously.

They sell them here for $25, I'm sure you can find them in Iraq for $10 less

(Girls)- under 5 can wear regular modest clothing. I'd avoid really bright colors and stick with neutrals. Not a big deal though, nothing to get stressed over. I found the Iraqi and Iranians very nice to the little ones.
Don't forget the socks and a hat if not wearing a scarf.
Older girls should wear an abaya and over 9 also a chador...with socks!
Don't forget lots of underwear for them


Shoes-
A lot of people in my group had crocs. Easy to slip on and off and light and comfortable. I personally wore Toms, but found they got very dusty as they're canvas. I'd suggest those ever so fashionable Crocs.

These seemed the most sensible and comfortable.  $31 on Croc website

Stroller- Yes I took one, for my 3 yr old. Invaluable, it's broken now though, after they threw it in and out of the bus, so don't take your Peg Perego!

Nappies-Do not forget them and pack enough for as long as you are staying. I ran out in Iran and had to buy from there, unless there are bigger stores elsewhere, the one I found had nappies from the 1970's, you know the plastic bulky kind. Its still manageable, if necessary, your kid may not be happy though, definitely NOT breathable.

2: Decisions

With my determination in hand, I sought out a group that would meet my needs. I chose Spiritual Journeys.  Simultaneously, I was busily trying to sort out the childcare I needed if I was going on my own to make this happen. Nothing seemed to fit what we needed, my mother and sisters all work, my husband has long hours, my in-laws live in London, not many choices left. My only option was to put them in childcare for 2 weeks and pray that they would adjust and cope with me gone.  Deep in my heart I knew I couldn't leave them, this would have to be a journey we all took together as a family. Initially, it was not an easy pill to swallow. My vision of sitting peacefully reciting, praying, reflecting at any time and for however long, were now being challenged and I have to admit I panicked.

Masjid Kufa

I could fully imagine the whining, crying, nappy changing, toilet taking, feeding, dressing, lifting, consoling, explaining, and washing, that I would be in store for. However, I came to terms with the fact that going together as a family would mean that all of us would be at peace and that in itself would bring about a different sort of spiritual satisfaction and reward. This would be my struggle and my test, this was how desperate I was to visit the foundations of this faith.
The happiness I saw in their eyes when they heard the news, of travelling together, melted any bitterness I had left.  I submitted to Allah's will and mercy and accepted my invitation to my blessed Imams as a part of whole.

That decision made, next was the planning and preparation, which, with children, especially 4, always requires attention to detail.

1: Intention

Imam Sadiq (a.s.) narrates, 'Allah has appointed some angels at Imam Husain's grave. When a Shia makes the intention for Imam Husain's (a.s.) Ziarat, Allah forgives all his sins. When he takes a step to go for Ziarat, he erases his sins. His virtues multiply and they increase till the time he becomes worthy of Paradise’. 

(Wasailul Mohibbeen, pg. 280)

Our new year begins without the fireworks and celebration but with the same reflection of months past and resolutions for the coming ones.  Moharram 2011/2012 was a pivotal month for me, Allah(swt) opened my heart and eyes this year, opened my eyes to my wasteful and material lifestyle, made it clearer to me about the dangers of this world and false notions of what's important.  With each string I was breaking that held me to this world I felt I was being pulled closer to the calling of my Imams. With each description of pilgrims, that Sayed Ammar Nakshawani narrated, who flock to our beloved Imams and weep in their presence humbly rubbing their cheeks against the bars that keep them apart, I felt an increasing desire I hadn't really felt before other than when I was summoned on hajj in 2006. Its an insatiable voice, it stops at nothing, it has a mind of its own and will not be silenced until it is aim is met.  And that is when my Ziyarat began.

Initially, I was selfish, I only thought of myself going, to fulfill that burning desire I had inside, however, my kids would have none of it. I have a 13 yr old, a 9 yr. old, 4 yr. old, and a 3 yr old. Yes, a mother of 4. Of course, I had no intention whatsoever of taking my younger 2 because that would mean less ibadat for me, less focus, less time, less independence. I couldn't even imagine them coming with me. My initial vision was being completely lost in devotion in the very threshold of ahle Muhammad. That of course was not the case...